Saturday, November 22, 2008
And before they emerged, all was out. But who, who, who?
Selectors? Captain? Or coach? Who is the mystery leak?
Call in the CBI I say, and let's find that blabbering beak.
Or go live on every channel, that's smoking in the air.
Give everyone a ear to the door, I think it's only fair.
Add a commercial break or two, rake in a million more;
Bring in the dancing girls, and you could make it four.
Let's play it under the lights, at the Eden, Kotla or Mumbai;
Coloured clothing, sponsorships, tickets. Surely that's okay!
A giant scoreboard and screen? To play back every catch?
When the circus is done, a prize for the man-of-the-match?
The Indian Selection League, sirs, is what I propose today
Make me the Chairman or CEO, I'll make the tamasha pay.
Much, much more moolah, than the IPL will ever bring
Poor Lalit will have to wait in line, while the Board my praises sing.
Friday, November 21, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
The Poms only clapped, their legs too sore.
The crowd went wild, bayed for more blood,
And Yuvraj, he obliged with another flood.
Just after the game, I heard 'em voices ring;
"Singh is King, Singh is King, Singh is King."
Pause a moment, consider this irony;
The king just lost his vice captaincy.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Monday, November 10, 2008
Monday, November 3, 2008
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
With more young legs, but a little less wise.
The great McGrath, Gilly & Warne are out;
But look who they've hired to stop a rout.
Not Murali, not Mendis as one would think
But a selection inspired by many a drink.
His first name is Greg, and Chappel the last
And that's where he left us in the recent past.
Now I'm hoping like hell (have my fingers crossed),
That Greg will do it again, at Ricky Ponting's cost.
Monday, September 8, 2008
A dashing young batsman was Kevin Pete,
Who South African standards didn't meet,
So he packed his gear and
Flew to his mother's land
And now the Proteas at his hands are being beat.
Click here for more meat on Pete.
So if not a record breaking sprinter, Usain Bolt might have been doing cricket in the Caribbean a few favours.
Friday, September 5, 2008
Friday, August 29, 2008
Victory finally for the Men in Blue
Not 4-1, but a comfortable 3-2
No Veeru, no Tendler, no Lambu
Nor the ever reliable Jumbo.
Just Dhoni standing tall and true.
Leaving all, his absence in the Tests, to rue.
Monday, August 25, 2008
More on this Minteresting story here.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
On a less important note, the highly overpaid cricketers of this country scraped past a measly Lankan total with just 3 wickets to spare.
I hope these sporting stalwarts receive the recognition and monetary reward they are due from the Government. It will be a shame if we ever hear of Olympic medals being sold in the face of poverty.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Remember that bowler named Sree,
From beautiful God's own country?
At the end of a match
Only a slap did he catch,
At the hands of a gent named Bhajji.
Poor Sree, he shed tears galore,
And for the cam, wept some more.
Some asked for Bhajji's head.
Some begged pardon instead.
Said 'His passion just came to the fore.'
Much remorse to the table did Bhajji bring
When he sat down with the Judicial Ring.
Said "Sree is my brother,
I love him like no other."
And so Sree became Sri Santa Singh.
Monday, August 18, 2008
I like the idea of Mallika's forehand going down the line every time someone misfields, bowls a wide, gets out for a duck etc. (Ugly aur Pagli has 99 references to the afore mentioned forehand.)
There was a captain named Dhoni.
Said, 'I don't play just for the money'.
The reasons for our defeat,
Can be blamed on tired feet
And a choc-a-bloc itinerary.
The Board came back all flared.
'Go if you're tired' they dared.
'The IPL was the best
Time for you to rest
Now let us of your tirade be spared.'
So off he went on his much needed break
But not so long that his wallet would ache
Then he'd come back and win.
Master Murali-Mendis' spin.
And thus he did for his country's sake?
Alas the plot went ding dong
Someone sang another song.
The Indian team lost,
Gave credit to the host,
And Dhoni said, 'We read the pitch wrong'.
Ding dong bell,
Dhoni's in the well.
Who put him in?
A big mouth and foot within.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
India 223 for 10. Following on, 138 for 10. Ajantha was tremendis. And Murali's balls, well clear of Hair, crashed through Indian reputations and defences with predictable regularity.
Mendis finished with 8. Murali finished with 11. And India were well, just finished.
We come back again in a few days for another contest between the Paper Tigers and the Lankan Lions. It starts at Galle on July 31, 2008, and will in all likelihood hardly resemble a contest. (Just for the record, 'Galle' and 'maul' rhyme. Please note that I pointed it out first)
Till then, click here for a blast from the past.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
And going by Ajantha's Asia Cup heroics on a flat, batting wicket, it looks like the Emerald Isle has found the successor to King Murali's throne.
More stats on Ajantha Mendis here.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Meanwhile the farcical drama to save Bhajji the blushes and a ban, touched soap operatic heights. The Turbanator and the Turbanated spoke of brotherly ties. And Sreesanth was adopted, perhaps without his prior consent. (Santhakumaran Sreesanth Singh? Or Santa Singh? He..he..he)
The final decision on this matter will still hover around cheeks, and the Turbanator might just have to pucker up for some very fervent kissing.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
The game seems to be further loaded in favour of batsmen. The boundaries are shorter.
The tables have turned. India now has the phirangs(cheerleaders) dancing for them.
The cheerleaders look fine, but the camera angles don't.
Sledging might become less prevalent. It's hard to be friendly team mates one day, and then be abusive opponents on another.
Cricket is taking on baseball hues. Finesse, style, and maybe even timing, will soon be lost causes.
I still wonder why Shane Warne retired. You will too if you've watched the Rajasthan Royals.
Monday, April 7, 2008
Whose side are you on?
If it's China, you don't have to go any further than this.
If it's Tibet, copy these ads and post them on your blog, and pass the word on to other bloggers. If you're not a blogger, save the ads on to your computer and mail them out to as many people as you think might care.
Click on image to enlarge.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
How long will the latest ban on Shoaib Akhtar last?
a) 5 years
b) 5 months
c) 5 weeks
d) 5 days
Friday, March 28, 2008
The BCCI has objected to Mushtaq Ahmed and Rana Naved-ul-Hasan being given a NOC by the Pakistan board to play county cricket in 2008. And they're pulling all strings to cut the lifeline of these players. Delusions of power? Aided by a bunch of boards who are scared of taking on the monetary might of the BCCI?
I know where the last game of this match will be played. In court. A place where the BCCI has as much clout as the man on the street. Now the BCCI must realise that while it runs cricket in the country, it cannot run over the constitutional rights of a citizen. Nor can it tell another country how to run the game there. Sooner or later, some board's going to turn self-respecting and stick up a finger. Where? When? How? Wait. Watch.
Monday, March 24, 2008
I believe this is going to be a much harder series for India than the one they've just emerged from. Not withstanding the retirement of Shaun Pollock, the South African attack looks sharper, and faster, than I ever remember it to have been. Dale 'the Gale' Steyn is blowing batting line-ups away with amazing regularity. Three out of three man-of-the-series awards is no little achievement irrespective of the opposition and the Indian batsmen will be well advised not to blink. Steyn hovers around the 150 kmph mark without straying from the space between off and leg stump. You miss, he hits.
Steaming in from the other end with the regularity of an electric train will be Makhaya Ntini. Angling the cherry away from left-handers and sharply into batsmen facing the other way. Then there's Morne Morkel who brings the ball down from what's nearly the peak of Petronas. Add the strong shoulders of Jacques Kallis to the equation and you have a pace attack with enough variety to trouble the best.
When it comes to putting runs on the board for the Proteas, two names come to the fore. Kallis and Graeme Smith. Necessarily in that order. These are the willow wielders I expect to hurt the Indian team's chances the most. The Kallis threat needs no introduction. He's been giving his bowlers something substantial to bowl at for years, and can be expected to continue the good work. Smith on the other hand is less predictable. But a look at his stats will convince you that when he scores, he scores big. And that's the danger. If out of 6 innings, he maximises in 2, the Indians are going to be chasing a very tall order.
To sum it up, the result of this series depends on how India handles Steyn, Kallis and Smith. If they strike gold, the home team will have to settle for silver.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Substance abuse? Gosh no! Hair is as clean as a bald man's pate. It's what the aggrieved country claims to be abuse of power. Remember, Hair first stood up in cricketing circles when he called Murali for chucking. The last was Pakistan for ball-tampering. Though nothing was proved to the contrary, Hair was cut down to size.
Now he's back in the thick of things, but indications are that it won't be for long. His contract expires in 2009, and by the looks of it ICC will be losing Hair then.
The cricinfo story is HERE.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Viewers on the other hand have been denied a kick-ass contest. And one sided as it would have been, it's always great fun to see a well walloped Aussie rear.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Security concerns with able-bodied bouncers like Symmo on board?
Monday, March 10, 2008
Sunday, March 9, 2008
And when they awoke they also found a trophy missing from their cabinet.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
For an entire summer, it's been the topic of debate - Symonds' gentlemanly qualities on the cricket field. Today his full bodied tackle of a streaker half his size, clarified it all.
Which makes me wonder.
What did the the men in blue have to handle through the series from this barbarian? You'll agree there's nothing gentle about Andrew Symonds apart from his off-spin.
And guess what, I finally found an Aussie who agrees.
"The Indians are on to something with their Symonds obsession. The land of gurus and enlightenment know that we have a cricketer so neanderthal that he should sleep in a cage." Garth Montgomery, the Sydney Daily Telegraph's blogs editor, stands up for the naked underdog.
Here's the link to the others' reactions.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Symonds went from being equally involved in the words exchanged to being let off scot free. That's the same offense for which Bhajji was fined.
Who, tell me, is the respected judge in this court? I'd like to press a charge of racial discrimination.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
145 test matches
Sachin's latest stats
124 test matches
Anil's latest stats
Now I'd like to apply the popularly accepted conversion of wickets to runs.
5 wickets = 100 runs
So Anil Kumble's 603 puts him a tad over 12000 runs, which is a few tads more than Sachin Tendulkar in a few less matches.
I've just cast my vote on who I think is India's greatest cricketer. What do you think?
Monday, January 7, 2008
Much has been said in the last few days about racism in cricket. Fingers have been pointed and decisions handed out. Opinions are everywhere. Culprits of the past have magically transformed into upholders of everything sacred, as they sermonise from the safety of the commentary box.
However, brushed under the carpet amidst the charge of racism is an equally important issue. Dishonesty, or to put it crudely, cheating. Both Ponting and Clarke claimed catches when the ball had clearly been grounded in the process of taking the catch. Isn't that bringing the game to disrepute? Isn't that putting to shame the cricketing fraternity and the Australian nation? Dishonesty is as deplorable as racism. While the charge against Harbhajan remains unsubstantiated, the evidence of poor sportsmanship is clearly visible in several replays. Ponting was guilty and so was the 'pup' who is expected to follow in his footsteps as the captain of the Baggy Greens.
I wonder what the ICC plans to do about it. It's simply not fair to ask an umpire to be accountable for a wrong decision, when players go scot-free for deliberately misleading them.
And if wrong appealing wasn't bad enough, the players in question also turn up at the press conference and deny any knowledge of what happened, profess fair play and lay the onus on the umpires. Ponting even went as far as asking a journalist, "Are you questioning my integrity?".
I wonder what Ricky thought the whole matter was about.
Ponting's actions have brought not just the game, but also the Australian nation, to serious disrepute. India has only lost a test match. Australia has lost face.
Saint Ponting. How does that sound?
I like Icky Ponting better.
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Slater vs Dravid
McGrath vs Sarwan
Symonds vs Pathan
Greig puts McGrath on the spot
The Australian media point of view
And finally a funny look at it all
Earlier it was Ponting. A ball comes off Dhoni's pad. Ponting dives to catch it. Appeals. Replays show the ball touching the grass as he landed. Ponting appeals again. This time on behalf of his integrity.
Seems quite apt that Clarke is slated to be Ponting's successor at the helm of the team from Down Under.
In my humble opinion the 2 men whose performances turned the game on its head are Steve Bucknor and Mark Benson. Surely they deserve the prize.